Dogs deserve their rest
This is about my dog, Khaleesi, but she’s known by a lot of nicknames.
It’s all disorienting, a bit, kinda, pretty completely. One of the facets of grief I’m experiencing is one where I harbor anger. That anger is currently being directed at myself, anticipating I can “make something” that will somehow “match” the shared affection between her and I and the rest of my family. This is to say, I’m dissatisfied with this for that exact reason. It’s all fostered in insecurity, very likely the same insecurity I’ve dealt with art/expressing myself.
I even hate that I’m talking about myself right now.
I know the bitterness passes, it has before.
So I think I’ll just describe this writing as “visceral” if anything. There’s more to say. Maybe it’ll arrive sometime in the future when the pain lessens.
We will be putting her down sometime next week. A scheduled appointment to end the chapter that lasted near half my lifetime. There’s many a sweet creature, but she’s the sweetestheartiest creature I’ve known. I’ll miss her forever.
🎼Forevermore to my Leesi🐾🎵
Dog Named Beau by Rookie Card
Someone to Die For by Belly
Harvey by Alex G
Ravens by Mount Eerie
You are every memory by Lucy Liyou
Grove by Melaina Kol
And Then When You Opened It There Was Light As Far the Eye Can See by My Guitar Is Trying to Kill Me
Bonus bit-ish: I had drawn the doodle below on my nightstand when I was 16 or so. That age was perhaps my worst. Every bit of my life felt like it was crumbling, yet my dogs anchored me. It is my rendition of the had to do it to em guy saying, “I believe in a heaven just so that my dogs got somewhere to go when all of this is over”.
